I am still alive...

I realised (how they spell it here) that I have not written in so long.  My tutorials have conveniently merged into the same day.  So now I have a weekly effort to provide 19-20 pages of writing on Thursdays.  And it is not like I can avoid the effects of producing less than good work, because I get immediate feedback, which means if it is not good I get to see the frown on my tutor's face and I have to struggle to answer questions about the topic.  It is a great motivation to work hard.  

But...I feel like I have been working a little too hard.  I think I am going to try to talk it over with my tutors.  By the way I think everyone should get to have a tutor they are wonderful.  

Here is a little story one of my tutors shared with me.  He brought it up when I finally confessed my envy.  "You know something about everything, you speak seven languages, and you have to tell me how you have been able to do this?"  He laughed at me, but you could see he took my frustration as a sort of compliment. 

"you know I felt the exact same way with my tutor, one in particular.  He recognized my attitude about the whole matter.  He finally said one day you know what why don't we just stop all this, because clearly you are not satisfied, what is the point?"  Dr. Crowe humbly laughed at his own story.  "I wanted to read everything, know everything, and I was so frustrated that I could not."  The solution his tutor came up with:  ignore the whole reading and writing papers and instead sit on some couches and discuss their for-fun-reading over a glass of wine.  He assured me that this would probably not be done nowadays but that it happened to him.  

Another friend of mine was at her breaking point and when she sent her paper to her tutor 25 minutes late she already had an email in her in box telling her that her tutor did not have time to read it before and to bring it to the office when she came.  This is was not a good sign.  The first thing her tutor asked her was "What is going on?"  When tears accompanied her words of stress and fear of not getting everything done her tutor threw the paper in her desk and they went for a walk.  Instead of working they went and toured Worcester College.  Her tutor related stories from her day as a student and showed her were Lewis Carol was inspired to write Alice and Wonderland.  

It has been great here, it is hard, but great.